Things Not To Say To Someone Experiencing Infertility

Yesterday I hit what I would call my breaking point, maybe rock bottom of this whole infertility..I think my problem is the things people say when we tell them were going through fertility treatments and about us wanting a baby.  I find myself trying to get out of things when it has anything to do with babies...I had my cousins baby shower on the 26th of February and I was sick I did not want to go because I dont understand this whole why do I have to go through this. I broke down to my husband and just told him I am done even though its been three months but thats three months of going to the doctors 3 times a month and getting pricked and poked. I just feel like giving up.....I thought I would be emotionally prepared for this but everyone did keep telling me about after 3 months it starts to get harder and harder. So here is my top things not to say to ME or anyone else going through INFERTILITY:

1. You need to relax, when you stop thinking and worrying about it, it will happen........

 ~Really how can you stop thinking about something when your going through TREATMENTS your in the doctors office 3 times a month. Your reminded everyday when you have to take the MEDICINE, and YOU KEEP BRINGING THE WHOLE BABY THING UP you cant forget about it! But telling me that I need to relax sounds like you're blaming me.  Infertility is a kind of illness, a malfunction of one of the body's systems, so please treat it that way.  You wouldn't tell a cancer patient that she'll get well if she will "relax", would you?

2. Oh, you're still young. It will happen......

~ Really again i'm not that young and how do you know it will happen. Don't give me false hope based on nothing more than your need to be "supportive". 

3. If it is meant to be God will bless you with children....

~Ok this i think is my favorite. Please someone explain the backwardness of why some women and men can have children when someone else takes care of them, They get them taken away due to abuse or being neglected. Or in the worse case people killing there children..Why is it they can have children but with me and some others out there going through this problem the GREAT people cant have kids and thats because if it was meant to be God will bless you with children.....REALLY

 I know that people want to help, they want to be encouraging, and they want to say something.  I truly appreciate all of the people who listened, who cared, who prayed, and who felt some empathy with us.  I don't believe that any of the inappropriate things people may have said were said out of spite.  And believe me, I'm not perfect either, so I learned from my own "foot-in-mouth" experiences what not to say to other people going through this.  The same principles can be applied to any other situation where someone is suffering and you want to say something.  Acknowledge the pain, offer your support, and express your hope that things will get better. If someone shares their infertility issues with you, I think the best thing to say is something like this, "I'm sorry you're going through this.  I know it's difficult, and I hope things work out for you.  Let me know if there's anything I can do." And if any of you now reading this are going through it, that is what I want to say to you.

 

Day 13 Husband Gives Me First Shot!

So it is day 13 and I have to take my shot before I go to work. I wake my husband up to give it to me. As he crawls out of bed and comes into the kitchen, he begins to wash his hands and states " I am not very comfortable with giving you this shot in your stomach. Why do I have to do it?" Ok let me remind you and him One I have to take the shot today and usually his sister gives it to me but it is 7 am in the morning and who is going to come and give it to me this early. and two Just put your big girl panties on and deal with it. I am beginning to think that the hormones are going to burst with a little bit of anger right about now. I would give it to myself but I am to nervous and shake, it is just easier for someone else to do it.  So as we get everything set up for the shot like we are supposed to I lift my shirt up and pinch a little bit of skin and he STABS thats right STABS me with it...Well it didnt hurt going in but it was the way he was holding the shot which made it look like he was stabbing me. As he pulls it out it began to bleed a little, (note it has not done that before) and also later on that night i get home and I have a bruise on my stomach, ( note I have not done that before either).  All in all besides the stabbing, bleeding and bruising he did a good job for his first time!

February 24th Day 12!

Another trip back to the doctor...As much as i have been there in the past three months i feel like i should ask if i can rent a room out at the hospital attached to my doctors building. Same routine nothing really different. My right ovary no eggs when i heard that i began to sweat i started thinking here we go the medicine is going to stop working. Then when he checked my left ovary he said "wow your left ovary has been really busy this month 3 egg follicles."  At the end of this appointment it was a little different than before. They pulled Jon and I into a room afterwords and told me that I am responding very well to the Clomid but my  endometrium lining was thinner than they want it to be. So If i don't get pregnant this month I have to start a new fertility medicine next month to help with that and we start IUI in march and try it for the next three months and hope that at some point it will work. They also told me that I am producing the max number of eggs on 50mg of clomid and if i produce any more than that on the new medicine they will have to cancel my sessions due to a high risk of multiples!

Lets just say I was a little bit disappointed:(

Back to the doctors!!!

To my SURPRISE i started the day after my 29th birthday. February 13th (Whats with the Sundays)??? I am a week early. Day one called the doctors this time they said they didn't want to see me day 3 but to come in on day 12 instead of 14 because day 14 i was further along in my egg maturity..So we have a doctors app tomorrow (Thursday the 24th.) and we will see where it goes from there! How many eggs could we have this time? Lets all hope for us to get pregnant by the end of march so we can have a baby this year!

What am I Feeling????

  I am 8 DPO(Day Past Ovulation) and i am having some cramping. I started with some slight cramping yesterday and continued into today with a little more sharp pains that catch me off guard also my temperature is up a little..   I have done the research on it and A LOT of the information i have contained is that it could possibly be egg implantation and early signs of pregnancy. I am not getting my hopes up but i am having different signs this month after the clomid and the shot than i did last month???? WHAT COULD IT BE!!! I have 20 more days to wait to find out if i am pregnant!! AHHH THE WAIT!!!!!!!!!